After all, half your make up IS NOT better than no make-up

I have pink eye.  Not make up painted pink eyes that sparkle and shine like the break of day, but like cooties-style pink eye.  Damnit.  I got it about 2 weeks ago when my gym was changing out some stuff and working in some new protocol for cleaning the machines.  For some reason there were no spray bottles to clean with that day, that's a frustration for another day.  The gross sweat everywhere still haunts me.  As does this damn itchy eye.

Luckily, I have some left over eye drops from when the kids have been infected thusly so.  I used it for about 2 days or so and thought I had my eye all fancied back up, but no.  I was so wrong.  So I used it for, well, the past 4-5 days. The results?  I have single handily created an expired-antibotic resistant mutated strand of conjunctivitis.  Go figure.  Yay me.

I had to go to "work" today.  Being the reasonable genius that I am, I note the troubles that will ensue if I use my good wedding make up (yea, I like leftovers.) to paint my fucked up eye on.  CHOAS!  That's what!

Well, I would at least have to throw half of it away. Hahaha get it?  half- for one eye.  But really I would have to throw it ALL away.  NO DEAL.  Do you hear me?  NO DEAL!

So, logically, I only put make up on my face and semi-close to the bad eye, and make up on the one good one.  All because I don't have a goddamn eye patch.  I always wanted to be a pirate and turns out I'm already shitty at it.  New goal....

Well, as fantastic as it sounds like I *might* have looked, you would be surprisingly mistaken.  I did not look fancy at all.  I looked like a pirate-less eyepatch (True story as my high school mascot was a pirate.) or, more maybe* an eyepatch-less pirate.

So.  Tomorrow.  I get to be split personality with my make up or a fucked up pirate.  Which would you go with?